Being A New Parent Is The Hardest Thing Ever. Michael Palascak

09 Th11, 2020
33 797 lượt xem

Being a new parent is the hardest thing ever, at least that how Michael Palascak describes it in the clip from his full Dry Bar Comedy special. Whether it's never getting any sleep or having to watch Peppa Pig on repeat, being a new parent is bound to test you. Watch "1984" by Michael Palascak only at
If you enjoyed this clip from Michael Palascak be sure to click the links below for more Dry Bar Comedians you might enjoy!
Christian Pieper
Shayne Smith
Alex Velluto
Want More Dry Bar Comedy?
Check us out on our other social media channels.

  • Yes! Sleep like a baby they say!!! But babies don't sleep!!! So cruel!

    LyndsilooLyndsiloo12 ngày trước
  • 0:48 I finally enjoy life thanks to, *p a i d t o b e h o m e .c o m*

    michał wiśniamichał wiśnia14 ngày trước
  • Being a parent is not for the weak.

    Cynthia TinglerCynthia Tingler14 ngày trước
  • You go from one moment fully independent to indentured servant. Good buy two seat sports car to hello Chevy Chevy Laguna Station wagon. But you know what I would change only one thing, invest more time into that little girl. She's the best thing that ever happened to me.

    Aaron LopezAaron Lopez14 ngày trước
  • Funny.

    Lyric MaloLyric Malo14 ngày trước
  • It seems crazy to me that mostly everyone I know has kids just because they were socially programmed to want them. No one ever said to me, "Having kids is a serious manner and a lifelong commitment, so THESE ARE THE REASONS WHY I WANT KIDS." No. They just had intimacy and procreated just because they wanted to be parents. There was no sane reason. Just an urge; something they yearned. That's all. No one ever gave me a sane reason other than the pre-programmed one. "Oh, kids are a blessing! We were created to have kids." I can't accept living life based on yearnings or illogical reasonings. There must be a purpose to everything. Otherwise, it seems chaotic to me, just winging it through life. People I know just want to go through parenthood. They don't think about the future. They don't count pros and cons. They just accept that the cons will be part of the experience. They just want to fulfill their desire. That seems crazy to me. Sure, a family is a beautiful thing, and a home with kids is just another world, and another chance for parents to experience childhood again from an adult perspective. In my case, I don't want to travel down that road. Growing up from being a baby to being an adult was enough for me. I had a beautiful childhood and was blessed with loving, caring parents, but inside of me, the human experience was scary and grueling. I still remember some of my early childhood existential inquiries. This...whole thing...of being inside a body and not remembering when I was born or exactly where I came from before that, of not remembering if I knew who I was prior to that, of not knowing when my heart will stop and what I'll experience, of looking through my eyes and experiencing what I see as if all was an act, of being conscious of my own consciousness, of having a mind I really can't control, of not really understanding how I know that I am myself...that I am me, or what makes me has been too much of a burden since I became aware that I was a being. All of this has been too much since my childhood and it still is. Things such as perceiving an internal voice that my ears can't hear and knowing it is mine but not knowing how it happens or where it comes from, having random thoughts, having dreams, being able to use my imagination without a clue as to how it operates, feeling deja-vu, phantom nostalgia when seeing a scenery or smelling something...all of that never felt right to me, and it still doesn't. Too many things I experience happens without my control. If they are inside of me, I SHOULD MASTER THEM, NOT BE MASTERED BY THEM. It has been way too burdensome for me to merely exist as a human to just go ahead and bring another one into this world and risk him or her suffering what I went through and still go through. It's just a lifetime of questions and inquiries. It's just not a solid system, and the people in it are in my opinion completely illogical. Because being illogical is the norm of human society, and questioning the insanity of it all makes one seem insane, I can't multiply like this. It would be selfish of me to bring offspring into an existential system I totally do not understand and that I have to internally and externally endure from the moment I wake up until the moment I fall asleep. It would be a betrayal to my offspring to bring them into this chaotic, deceived society that operates by mere urges and unfounded desires, just mindlessly wasting their lives in vanity. All I've seen is people throwing themselves away piece by piece into a bottomless abyss, living a gamble, playing it by ear in the mystery of human life. They all want to be part of a program that doesn't work. They are born, they grow old and they die, and it keeps going and going with every generation. People waste their lives in a selfish, individually constructed perception of life that is far from reality, from the collective human situation. Ever since I was a child, in my naivety I vowed to not have children of my own, just so they didn't possibly go through this dilema. I am blessed that I now serve the Lord. His way is my purpose and what fulfills me. I found the Truth, which is available to anyone who desires it. A lot of people in my life need me, especially my twin sister, but humanly-speaking, just isolating my being from the beauty of my priviledged life, I yearn for the day that this biological system shuts down and I finally get to rest. It has been thirty-something years of internal turmoil. I'm just one big question mark with my arms extended, eagerly waiting to hug physical death, because it's the door to finally meet my answer.

    • Ok...

      Moe FMoe F11 ngày trước
    • Stfu

      Ynnnoj VYnnnoj V13 ngày trước
  • Hey dude To be the first child of your parents is even more difficult!!

    Zain Imtiyaz ShahZain Imtiyaz Shah14 ngày trước
  • Felt pretty ready for my son when he was born.

    Olle FjällströmOlle Fjällström14 ngày trước
  • ♥️👏😄

    Tom ArchibaldTom Archibald15 ngày trước
  • pleeeeasee upload his full special

    username316username31615 ngày trước
  • Listening to parents share their 'war' stories always makes for the best birth control, I love my sleep. Tiny humans sure are cute but waaay too high maintenance 😂 I don't know how you parents do it!

    Lilith ScytherLilith Scyther15 ngày trước
    • Haha

      1 Best Friend 2 u1 Best Friend 2 u10 ngày trước
    • When my first son was 2 years old I called my mom to ask her what was wrong with her that she chose to do this 7 times. 😂 lol It gets easier as they get older. : )

      Sandina 2centsSandina 2cents13 ngày trước
    • The rewards outweigh all the negatives ;)

      Mitch gMitch g14 ngày trước
  • Really? For us being new parents was not that hard. It was pretty great.

    N8errificN8errific15 ngày trước
    • @M Or his child had better taste in cartoons :P

      André Corazza MiguensAndré Corazza Miguens14 ngày trước
    • It WAS great. But my son didn't sleep AT ALL. It was still great and I still love it. lol

      CaityCaity14 ngày trước
    • You probably had a good sleeper then

      MM14 ngày trước
  • Lmao new parent.. Biden as supposedly president. Get that parent outta here

    Awesome AlieAwesome Alie15 ngày trước
  • so relatable. the pain is real.

    RedCaioRedCaio15 ngày trước
  • I’m there now, 22 months and 2 months. Pray for me, fock

    LeahLeah15 ngày trước
  • I misread this to "being a new president is the hardest thing.... you know. America recently.

    Le HoangLe Hoang15 ngày trước
    • @Mirela Feier I think we should get the option of a 30 day free trial for different presidents before we have to commit to subscribing again.

      Devi_916Devi_91614 ngày trước
    • Lmao there is no new president

      Mirela FeierMirela Feier14 ngày trước

    emily faithemily faith15 ngày trước
  • Please take out the changing banner in the bottom of the screen. Very distracting.

    Sean BSean B15 ngày trước
    • Get the app!

      Denae NicoleDenae Nicole14 ngày trước
    • I didn’t even notice but now I can’t unsee it.

      JXEJXE14 ngày trước
    • LMAO

      Corl FrancoCorl Franco15 ngày trước
    • ???

      Nancy XNancy X15 ngày trước
  • Ok, this was great.

    BoldCautionProductionsBoldCautionProductions15 ngày trước
  • I can laugh about the sleep deprivation now, decades later. At the time not laughing so much

    Mum VictoriaMum Victoria15 ngày trước
    • @Arely Munoz The maintenance man... 😆

    • There was one time when my husband, baby and I moved into our apartment by ourselves, our kid was 6mos. He was crying. My husband had to go in to work the next day so we alternated nights depending on who worked-anyways- he would not stop for anything. I fed him. Changed him. Rocked him. Burped him. All the things you are supposed to do when a baby cries. Nothing. He just wouldnt stop. At one point, I took him into the living room so husband could sleep without being awaken by the crying. And I was done. It was like 2 or 3 in the morning. He just would not stop. I didnt know what to do. At one point I start crying with him. Begging him to stop. His dad came out from the bedroom and took him and idek what he did but he got him to stop crying. I laugh about it now. But at that moment i was DONE!! Kids are so much better when you have a support network at home, family to pawn them off to because YOU KNOW there's that one aunt/grandma/cousin that just NEEDS to hold him/her for a while and "you rest a little bit while i take the baby." I didnt care at that point. Heck, the maintenance man could have taken him and my head would have hit the pillow on the floor so hard.....

      Arely MunozArely Munoz15 ngày trước
    • 😂

      Nancy XNancy X15 ngày trước
  • I like to sleep on the floor... by choice. Now I have questions

    Samuel OluwapelumiSamuel Oluwapelumi15 ngày trước
    • @JESUS IS CALLING YOU Ooh you get me, And it does wonders on the back also.

      Samuel OluwapelumiSamuel Oluwapelumi14 ngày trước
    • It's nice and firm...a change of pace. I like it sometimes! 🤓

  • Love this channel😂

    owobanana101owobanana10115 ngày trước
  • 👍👍👏👏😆😆

    Mercedes GalanMercedes Galan15 ngày trước
  • As soon as he started with "I'm a dad now" I knew he was gonna suck. In fact I'm typing this at about one minute in because I'm that sure he sucks. Every comedian who becomes a father should quit because they all end up sucking.

    Hershel WeaverHershel Weaver15 ngày trước
    • @André Corazza Miguens Well you're sassy. Lol

      CaityCaity13 ngày trước
    • @Caity A male's inability or perceived inability to perform tasks as well as he expects himself to is deeply disturbing. Let's call that poor fella exhibit A ;P

      André Corazza MiguensAndré Corazza Miguens13 ngày trước
    • @André Corazza Miguens Oh goodness. Lol. Well maybe there's a valid point here. I'm just curious what it is. 🤪

      CaityCaity13 ngày trước
    • @Caity He suffers from SPS... Small Penis Syndrome. It has physical but mainly psychological implications. Last week we had to put one down

      André Corazza MiguensAndré Corazza Miguens14 ngày trước
    • Aw. He had a few comical points. Lol. Why do you think becoming a father makes them worse though?

      CaityCaity14 ngày trước
  • 😴😴😴, aka, boring...

    Major Old Lady aka, MomMajor Old Lady aka, Mom15 ngày trước
    • Etiquette.

      Rock'n'roll JennyRock'n'roll Jenny15 ngày trước
  • Me to

    Epic YT TerrorEpic YT Terror15 ngày trước
  • Love this guy 👍😂

    Amy RaabAmy Raab15 ngày trước
  • How am I so early? 🤷‍♀️

    Mirela FeierMirela Feier15 ngày trước
  • *insert first joke* welp we gottem

    Mr.AltoidsMr.Altoids15 ngày trước
  • 1st

    pbkayakyerpbkayakyer15 ngày trước
    • @Major Old Lady aka, Mom you're just upset that you weren't 1st.🤣 /And if no one cared who was 1st, then it wouldn't be a thing.... also I only said it to bait someone into freaking out about it.(Mission accomplished) Heck I didn't even watch the video!!

      pbkayakyerpbkayakyer14 ngày trước
    • @Major Old Lady aka, Mom holy smokes lady! Maybe you should take a lesson in etiquette before you start preaching it! You literally made another comment saying this comic was boring! 😂😂😂 yikes on trikes

      Rock'n'roll JennyRock'n'roll Jenny15 ngày trước
    • Literally, no one cares who was the first 100th, 10,000th, 386,000th.... or first. Come back to the International Global platform called YT Comments when you have something semi-intelligent to contribute, ok? It's about THEM!... THE VLOGGERS. Leave a kind, encouraging word or two. AKA, Google YT Comment social ETIQUETTE. Ugh!

      Major Old Lady aka, MomMajor Old Lady aka, Mom15 ngày trước
  • First, but didn't want to be that guy...🤣😂🤣😂

    Forget-Me-Not Lawn CareForget-Me-Not Lawn Care15 ngày trước
    • Literally, no one cares who was the first 100th, 10,000th, 386,000th.... or first. Come back to the International Global platform called YT Comments when you have something semi-intelligent to contribute, ok? It's about THEM!... THE VLOGGERS. Leave a kind, encouraging word or two. AKA, Google YT Comment social ETIQUETTE. Ugh!

      Major Old Lady aka, MomMajor Old Lady aka, Mom15 ngày trước
  • Haha.

    Gideon EmmanuelGideon Emmanuel15 ngày trước